Irrepressible Hope: Focusing on the Positive

As you read from the previous post, it was only Bryn, Caelleb & I that made the trip down to Louisiana for Easter. This was not how I had imagined it would be, nor was it my choice. Honestly, on the 10 hour drive down to Monroe I had a lot of time to lament this fact. And I did, lament, that is. Eventually, if I lament for too long (10 hours is definitely too long) I find myself in a well of sadness & anger, which doesn't do me or anyone any good. . . But at some point near the bottom of that well the Holy Spirit reminds me that I have a choice. I can succumb to the pain, saddness & anger that I myself cannot heal (or control) OR I can rely on my Maker and trust that He is in control and He can heal the brokenness. He also gently reminds me of the abundance of blessings that are in my life that I am so grateful for.

By the time we hit the border of Louisiana I had made my choice: focus on the positive. Bryndyn and I got to spend some great one on one time with Caelleb & each other! We got to SLEEP in. We were not constantly making formula and adjusting our schedules around feeding times. We didn't change any dirty diapers. The first couple days with out Jamie were very strange and I often felt like I was forgetting something. But ultimately because we didn't have Jamie & Tia we were afforded the opportunity to spend extra time with Isabelle & Easton. That was a wonderful blessing & I cherished it!

If it were up to me, our van would have been much fuller on the trip down. But I am grateful for that weekend. I am grateful for the rest & relaxation that we got. I am grateful for the relationship I have with my sister and brother-in-law. I am grateful that Caelleb got to spend time with his cousins. I am grateful for my niece and nephews. I am grateful that all of these experiences are bringing Bryndyn and I closer together. I am just grateful. . .